Spring is here
Well... I'm home. After a long crazy week of exams, zero sleep and A LOT of cleaning I'm unpacked and settled into my mum's house. I'm surprised at what an emotional wreck I am. I laid in bed last night in Saint John and cried myself to sleep....feeling very reflective and very blessed and not quite sure if I'm ready for whatever comes next. I said goodbye to the Grace Harvest Youth on Thursday.. although I know it's not a goodbye.. it was just a "see ya soon." I really hope to be able to see them a lot this summer. I was able to get some soccer action pictures and yes Katie, I do have a picture of you in a tree! I'll send it to you! Last night we had our graduation for the students who had completed three years of training at the college. Check out the awesome school uniforms! Ewwwwwwwwww...and notice how I'm not wearing one... yet :) Well I'm going to go rent a movie. Peace is in my heart.
All in a day's work
I have no exciting news to post.. hence the lack of blogs lately. I write my last exam tomorrow morning and then my housemates and I attack our house and spend two days cleaning and scrubbing from top to bottom. We started tonight with the fridge-- you would be quite mortified at the things we found. When we moved in in September, we really didn't establish any cleaning rules. Our general rules was "If you see it's dirty, clean it, be considerate of each other and serve one another." Well... in the last month, we let that side a little. Yoguart that expired in January. Fermented tomato soup. Apple Juice that solidified. I guess that's the problem when we all have separate groceries... no one knows who's stuff is what and no one takes responsibility for anything... needless to say it was gross, but it was fun cleaning the fridge!
My room is packed into suitcases and I'll be going to my mum's on Saturday's. Hopefully I'll be going to Camp Medley in early May for a couple weeks with Rob to do some cleaning. We don't have exact dates yet but we should figure that out soon. Well...sorry y'all for the lack of inspiration and passion. All of my inspiration right now is coming from the Adolescent Psychology Text Book that I'm studying for tomorrow's exam and the homemade chocolate that Diana made me! Mmmmmm....there's nothing like studying without chocolate! Praise the Lord!
reflection
"go where you're celebrated not where you're tolerated"
-Matt White
Update on life
Home for Easter- Reviewing for Exams all week and then writing five exams next week- going home on the 28th.
shaking
Heb 12:25 See to it that you do not refuse him who speaks. If they did not escape when they refused him who warned them on earth, how much less will we, if we turn away from him who warns us from heaven?
Heb 12:26 At that time his voice shook the earth, but now he has promised, "Once more I will shake not only the earth but also the heavens."
Heb 12:27 The words "once more" indicate the removing of what can be shaken—that is, created things—so that what cannot be shaken may remain.
Heb 12:28 Therefore, since we are receiving a kingdom that cannot be shaken, let us be thankful, and so worship God acceptably with reverence and awe,
Heb 12:29 for our "God is a consuming fire."
Church Army for Life
I've been accepted into the "Church Army stream"... I know that makes no sense to a lot of you. It means that instead of finishing my schooling this April and figuring out what's next that I continue on and do another two years and graduate with a dipolma in Mission and Evangelism. It makes me excited and scared all at the same time. I'm really excited to have a focus, to have my life planned out for the next two years... but I know Jesus is calling me to die- maybe it's an easter theme, but I really feel in that it took me so long (four years) to give up and surrender to God's plan that as I continually die to my self that the next two years will be really life giving. Sooo..what's that mean?... I'm in my last two weeks of school, finishing up essays and then I'll be into exams towards the end of the month. Then I will be heading home to Fredericton on May 1st to figure out a summer job. My biggest excitment is the fall...although only tentative this far, the school is looking at sending me on a 12 month placement for my second year term. One option is in Victoria B.C. working with Captain Rick Sandberg at streethope. Check out streethope.org for more info. It's a ministry to kids on the street in downtown Victoria.
Heavenly Encounters?
SOooo..I've been hanging out in Fredericton with my school all weekend on a little mission trip. Everything has been going well. God has really been touching people's lives and I believe God is rekindling some flames. Even yesterday one young guy who had just re-committed his life to the Lord was walking up and down the streets looking for a church that was open. He said he prayed to the "Holy one in the sky" and now his life was changed and his thoughts were different and he just didn't know what to do with himself. Our team was gathered in the basement praying for the evening program when this guy wandered in so full of joy and excitement to find a church building open and to talk to people about the thoughts he was experiencing. I believe he experienced a deliverance and that he is going to be experiencing a lot more freedom. We prayed for him. Thanks God that we were in the right place at the right time... it was crazy and exciting.
We've been doing a lot of pushing through the past couple of days. I've really enjoyed the times of prayer and intercession that we've had as a school and community. If any fruit has come from this mission it's that God is really changing our school into one of formation instead of just academics and I really saw how God developed that the past couple of days. I really struggled with some of the program type things we did- they were good and they were fun but I'm just not used to programming- I'll adapt. The weekend was a good experience. Tonight to kinda finish of the weekend Jess and I decided to go for a walk downtown. We've been going to a school of Mission and Evangelism for a year and it's so frustrating that sometimes we feel like we don't get to use what we've learned. It's hard too sometimes when you feel like there's expectation- evangelize for a good grade, or use a certain formula (haha.. we don't have to do this)... but tonight was just one of those nights where we wanted to go for a walk, and where there were no time limitations, there were no expectations from others, we weren't leading, we didn't have to get stats for school- we were just a couple of girls going for a walk. As we were walking we starting to pray, we asked God to speak, we asked God to lead us to the one, we asked God for a sign (hahah). We walked around a couple of blocks... for a Saturday night, downtown seemed pretty dead, it was freezing out. We headed towards the bridge then turned up Queen Street. The city hall clock struck ten o'clock and as I was still praying I felt like this was an important hour but I didn't understand why???? Ten O'Clock... what happens at ten o'clock? The news? haha.. we kept walking.. kept praying, kept singing. Downtown was silent. We continued along Queen street and suddenly Jess noticed this new nightclub called "Boom"... we stopped and read the poster on the window "BOOM nightclub, Tonight Saturday, Open 8-2, Happy Hour 8-11, HEAVEN 10-2, blazing house tracks taking you to the next level" ... haha... so this caught us a little off guard... a nightclub claiming to take the people that visit their facility into the heavens.. "into the next level".. Was this the sign (literally) we had been praying for? Jess and I pulled up a park bench outside "Boom".. I remembered the city hall clock and how it had rang at ten and how something had gone off in my spirit- was this a declaration to the city- that a shift is coming- that the heavens are being opened up and that the people of Fredericton are going to the next level? The hour has come! We sat on the bench and continued to pray.. haha... I really wanted the sign that hung in the window "Heaven, blazing house tracks taking you to the next level." I really did not want to go in. I had never been into a club into my life and I didn't feel released to go.. and what was I supposed to say, "Hi, can I have the nice sign hanging in your window?" I really knew it was a prophetic sign though- I wanted it.. and God knew it. Two seconds later one of the gentlemen that works at "Boom" comes out with clipboard in hand and starts to circle Jess and I while he surveys the store front. I say, "Excuse me, do you work here?" He of course says yes. Me: "Do you have any of those signs that I could have?" The man (who's name turns out to be George) goes back into the club and comes out with a colored one for me. He asks me why I want it which made for a wonderful plug for the gospel... but it was nuts.. because I know that God specifically wanted him (George) to meet with us tonight. He's a "backslidden" Christian who professes be Spirit filled and pray in tongues. He was so interested, he didn't want to go back to work....and I don't want to go to bed.. but I'm wiped...but the last thing I must add is that right before we got up to leave we found out that "Boom" was a gay club and I just found it really interesting cuz we hung out on a park bench outside that club for two hours and chatted to people- Fredericton statisically per capita has the second most lesbians and gays in north america and I think God is doing something in that area over this city. Anyways, it was a good night, even the world recognizes what God is doing! ahah.. one man that we were chatting with outside began to open up and he called Jess a fortune teller..oh well... :) We just laughed. I think I might wander back to this park bench more often-- I think it's anointed.
The beauty of life
Ahhh.. I love life...because today I have learned that my life is not my own. I mean I've always known this but I love it when the knowledge comes with the deeper heart revelation and when the revelation stirs up an action within you. At homegroup last night I was remembering the night I was baptized and I wanted so much to re-live that moment. I think God was reminding me that I constantly need to to die to self so that I might experience full life.
In other news.. (I feel like the CBC news guy)... it's been quite an exciting week at school. I leave tomorrow for a four day mission to Fredericton with the school. It's kinda ironic that I'm going on a mission and I get to sleep in my own bed- whatever though, I'm not complaining. :) I applied to come back for the three year program at school- today I had a two hour meeting with four assessors who combed my entire life...it was pretty sweet.. NOT! Hahaha... actually it wasn't too bad, I was kinda nervous, some of the questions threw me off a little but I feel okay with how it went and I should know by the end of the week if I will be the next Captain Erin Stevenson (ew.. I don't like the sound of that.. no title please and thank you). It feels good to have some sort of direction- to be moving towards something- I haven't had this feeling in a long time. Even if nothing is written in stone yet. This is a for sure new season of my life.
"Whoever tried to keep his life will lose it, and whoever loses his life will preserve it."
thought
Just step out with what you know to do..
Lap 25
I'm runnning after something I can't see,
I don't want to miss the mark
You see, I'm running afer destiny..
I've got hope inside of me
and grace by my side
I've got faith that pushes me
and passion that will not die....
Keep me in step with the truth
I want to be paced with Jesus
Perfect time...
Perfect time...
Eyes fixed
Heart beating
One foot in front of the other-
Just keep running
I've got hope inside of me
and Grace by my side
I can't see the end
I can't see the prize
Just keep running
Just keep running
You won't miss the mark
Birthed out of today's frustrations/reflections about destiny- man- I don't think there's one day that I don't think about what I'm doing with my life and what the next step is and what decisions need to be made. Today's thought "walking by faith and not by sight." I can't see what the next step is and things don't completley make sense yet- It reminds me of swimming laps in the pool though, it might be similar for running (I'm not a runner so I don't really know). Say you're swimming forty laps, you start out slow and the first ten laps are pretty easy and then it builds and each lap gets harder and harder. By lap 25 you want to die and give up- but if you just push threw the last ten are super easy. I feel like I'm on lap 25. I've come soo far and worked so hard to get where I am, I am determined not to give up because I know that if I just push threw everything is going to make sense and the finish line and final puzzle piece of God's "mystery plan" is going to fall into place.
¶ 7:02 PM 1 comments
